Saturday, 25 February 2012

PODCAST: Terry Seabrook and Milestones reinterpret the music of Miles Davis

I wrote a piece for the Liverpool Post this week on the Brighton pianist Terry Seabrook and his band Milestones, who play Miles Davis's Kind of Blue album and a number of other Davis songs.
Terry is an interesting and articulate man who managed to sound enlightened and intelligent despite my terrible questions.
They play the Capstone Theatre in Liverpool on Thursday (March 1). Please support a wonderful venue and a great group of musicians.

Friday, 17 February 2012

A history of Liverpool in 100 statements

Stolen shamelessly from Frank McNally's wonderful Irish Times column 'An Irishman's Diary' here is my History of Liverpool in 100 Statements. It is based on the above hyperlinked story and its earlier counterpart, A History of Ireland in 100 euphemisms, which is one of the funniest things I have ever read.
All suggestions welcomed.
Please note football fans, this is not a chart, merely 100 phrases I threw together, so if a blue/ red phrase is too far down/ too far up, it is by accident not design.

A history of Liverpool in 100 statements

A working class hero is something to be
When you walk, through the storm
And the Evertonians have gone berserk. I haven’t seen a goal like that in a Merseyside derby for years
Got a bifter?
A bad wool
Do one
You got cob on?
Plazzy scouser
The pool of life
So fare thee well, my own true love
Here the weary are at rest
Ar ey you
They do though, don’t they though
How much is that doggie in the window?
We speak with an accent exceedingly rare, Meet under a statue exceedingly bare
If you want a cathedral, we’ve got one to spare
Paddy’s Wigwam
Liverpool…has become a wonder of the world. It is the New York of Europe, a world city rather than merely British provincial.
The Truth
If you are first you are first. If you are second you are nothing.
The Streets of Kenny
Yer blert
Plink Plink
Altogether Now
Wondrous Place
That immense City which stands like another Venice upon the water
Above Us Only Sky
Four Lads That Shook the World
Where it all began
Cellar Full of Memories
I have heard of the greatness of Liverpool but the reality far surpasses my expectation
A Pub on Every Corner
Posh Side
We’re not racists, we only hate Mancs
We’re not English, we are Scouse
Blackler’s Rocking Horse
Go ‘ead
I love the bones of ‘er
Sweatin’ cobs
Manchester Man, Liverpool Gentleman
Chairman Mao has never seen a greater show of red strength
What a beaut
The People’s Club
Mersey Pride
Don't buy The Sun
The discoverer of America was the maker of Liverpool
The riots
You to me are everything
In the town, where I was born
Hold your plums
Damon and Debbie
In bulk
Got any Gary’s, lad?
Sittin’ out
Jarg kecks
Boxing at the stadium
Unemployed, love the Floyd
Liverpoole is one of the wonders of Britain
Purple Aki
Getting off at Edgehill
Single to town
What’s the bobby, lad?
Calm down, calm down
Sound as a pound
Kid, kidder
Lad, lid
Any spares?
Out the game
A grotesque chaos… a Labour Council, a Labour Council
Swimming cozzie
Bitten by a mozzie
Going the hozzie
Bad muzzie 
In his cups
By the banks of the royal blue Mersey
This is Anfield
Self Pity City
On the ale
He’s a divvy when he’s on the bevvy
Barm pot
Bag ‘ead/ Smack ‘ead/ On the gear
Fly away/ casey
Tuppence ‘cross the Mersey
Arl arse
Cunard Yanks
Is right
One Night in Istanbul
Aintree Iron
 ‘cause this land's the place I love, and here I'll stay
Tell me ma, me ma
Soft lad

EDIT: Mike Hill suggested a couple of crackers, one of which was an inexcusable miss.
- Gizza Job
- Joey made the Swiss roll

Saturday, 3 December 2011

PODCAST: Paul Du Noyer on the lost art of the album sleeve

AWARD winning Merseyside author Paul Du Noyer recently gave a talk titled 'Art on its Sleeve: Why Music is Good but Cardboard is Beautiful' at the V&A museum in London about the history and development of sleeve art on records.
As I couldn't be there, I asked him to recap the main points over coffee and muffins in FACT in Liverpool.
It wasn't the best environment to record a podcast, so listen out for the sound of heavy rock instrumental on the PA, a volatile coffee machine and a man offering us sweets from a vast silver bowl.

Some of examples of the covers Paul discussed today.

DuNoyer Podcast Layout 1

New designs for a student magazine

I'm mucking about with simple designs for a new magazine my students are going to edit at university.
So, I'm sticking up some designs to get some feedback and critique. Tell me what you think.
There is a problem with a missing font on the headers (top left/ top right) but other than that, I'm keeping it simple for new and inexperienced designers.

Immediate DPS 2

Thursday, 1 December 2011

The End: A classic fanzine reborn

I posted an interview with Peter Hooton on the classic Liverpool fanzine over on my other blog. Have a read of it here. Thanks to him for his time.

Wednesday, 30 November 2011

Proof that newspapers should never pose a question if the answer may be inconvenient

Mail splash this morning:

Mail online poll this morning (later spiked)

Thanks to  for finding and posting the online poll on Twitter.

Tuesday, 22 November 2011

Daily Mail links women's movement to autism and then prints pictures of glamour model to show hard far it has to travel

The Daily Mail finally lapped itself in the crazy race today.
No 1: It linked growing autism rates to the rise in prominence for women in the work place and successful parents.
No 2: It then went on only four pars in to describe the belief that it was down to MMR, a story it had been the lead cheerleader for, for many years as a 'rather bizarre hypothesis'.
No 3: It, however, added the coupe de grace, which shows just how far the women's movement really has to go to achieve its goals, by publishing pictures of glamour model Imogen Thomas (famed for sleeping with a footballer) posing in duct tape to protest at a 'gag on her telling her story. It was irony, but only on a base level that a moron may consider advanced.
As I said, it lapped itself in the crazy race, but only as Jonathan Swift furiously spun in his grave at St Patrick's Cathedral in Dublin.

Saturday, 19 November 2011

A billion people are starving while the western media eats itself

The restaurant critics of the Independent and the Daily Telegraph are spied on by a Michelin star chef while eating at his restaurant. He tweets about it. The critics react to it. One writes a comment piece in reply.
We are, as the great man said, a virus with shoes